Legolas discovers Kool-aid
by Neril
Summary: Legolas has grown tired of Thranduil's wine, he sets off to kill orcs with his friend, and discovers a new AWESOME drink. (he's been hanging out with humans to long) Has fabulous orc slaying, koola-aid drinking, and tricking Adas.
1. Legolas tries Kool-aid & tricks his Ada

**If you read Thranduil's Eyebrows, this is much later, when Legolas is older. It was just going to be a one shot, but I got a idea for another chapter. So, when you read this and want more of, well, you'll see, it will come. :)**

"Ada, I'm leaving!" Legolas announced early one morning.

"What? Where are you going?"

"I told you about this a week ago, I'm going to meet Aragorn and kill some orcs, maybe a couple of Mary-Sues."

"Oh, okay. Have fun then!" Thranduil waved at his son with one hand, while reaching for his wine glass with the other. "Do you want any wine for the journey?"

"No, I'm fine," Legolas replied; frankly, he was a little tired of wine. He wanted something new, something, eh... not wine.

Legolas started off; he found his favorite horse, packed a few things, and made sure his phone was dead before he left. He had his favorite sword, and bow, and his quiver was full. All set for orc slaying, and not wine drinking.

He set off cheerfully through the forest, singing a little to himself. Around mid-day, he met up with Aragorn.

"Hello," he called cheerfully.

"Hello," Aragorn said, not so cheerfully.

"What's wrong," Legolas asked.

"I got attacked by orcs, pushed into a waterfall, and ran into a yellow jacket nest."

"Oh, well, my Ada won't stop trying to get me to drink wine, I mean, I'm sick of that stuff. I refuse to drink it for a thousand years."

"That's terrible," Aragorn said. "And here I am going on and on about being attacked by orcs, having a broken rib or two, and so on."

Legolas nodded. "I know it's just terrible. All that wine."

"Let's go kill some orcs then," Aragorn cheered. "That always seems to cheer you up."

-

Blood sprayed, splattering the ground, and staining it red. Aragorn flicked his sword, knocking off the blood. "Whew! That was intense!" he exclaimed, looking down at the fallen orc. He was pleased with his work, having killed his first orc for the day.

"Legolas! Did you see that! Was that awesome or what?!"

"Hmm, yeah, sure," Legolas replied. He was surveying the field around him, filled with the bodies of dead, and withering, dying orcs. Which were going to be dead in moments, so basically, dead.

"That was so spectacular!" Aragorn said, proud of his work. "Now! Let's go chase down the last of those foul beast, and slay them!" He turned to face Legolas.

"Oh, never mind." Aragorn's shoulder's slumped as he saw the dead – well, all dead now, orcs. Sorry, no more withering and pain. Unless you can be in pain after dying, which means... Ugh, never mind, I don't feel like starting a debate. Not that, forget it.

"Why do you never save any for me?" Aragorn whined.

"I did."

"Yeah, one."

"No, I saved two for you."

"You did! YAY. Wait, where is it?"

There was a whiz, then thump, then-

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Legolas patiently waited until Aragorn had finished screaming, (this is when Aragorn is still pretty young. NOT TWENTY!) Like, um...eh, never mind. After about thirty minutes of Aragorn screaming, Legolas got tired of waiting for him to kill the orc. He pulled out an arrow, and shot it through the orc's eye socket. It died.

Aragorn stopped screaming, "WHY DID YOU KILL MY ORC!"

"You were taking too long," Legolas replied. "Are you going to take the arrow out of your leg?"

"What? Arrow? What arrow? Oh. Why is there an arrow in my leg?"

"You got shot."

"By what?"

"The orc."

"I MUST EXTRACT MY REVENGE!" Aragorn roared. He jerked his sword in the air. And... it fell out of his hand, and landed on his foot.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Legolas walked up behind him, and hit him across the back of the head. He was really tired of listening to his screaming. No, really, he was tired, right after that he got his blanky he brought along, and took a nap.

-  
Aragorn woke up, laying on a table inside a Inn (not the Prancing Pony). This one was called the Running Away in Fear of Orcs Pony. Anyway, he woke up to loud noises, and Legolas glaring at a glass of wine in front of him.

"I refuse to drink this!" he exclaimed.

Aragorn slid off the table into a chair, his wounds had been sort of bandaged, enough to stop the bleeding anyway. Legolas picked up the glass of wine, and threw it across the room.

"Have you tried their Kool-aid?" Aragorn asked.

"Their what?"

"Kool-aid, it's a really good drink." Aragorn turned to a waiter. "Will you get us two glasses of tropical punch Kool-aid?"

The server nodded, and hurried off. Mostly, because he was afraid of Legolas. A couple minutes later, a different person served them their drinks.

Legolas tossed them a chunk of gold, and accepted the red drink. It kind of looked like wine. He stared at it suspiciously, took a sip.

"THIS IS AWESOME!"

Elves usually don't use that word, but he had been hanging around Aragorn too long.

"Another!" Legolas shouted, after he finished, crashing his cup to the floor. The owner of the Inn didn't care; he was in the back room with the gold chunk. Hunched over it, whispering, "My precious!" While drinking Kool-aid.

"Where do you get this wonderful stuff?" Legolas asked the waiter.

"We get it in shipments, but you can find it at Wal-Mart."

"I hate Wal-Mart!" Legolas snapped back.

"Well, um... you could have it shipped to you."

"Good. Send it to this address," Legolas scribbled down his Ada's address on some paper, and handed it to the waiter. "You will be paid, um... a lot of money."

The waiter's face lit up, and he hurried away, muttering, "Money, money, money!"

"Where to next?" Aragorn asked.

Legolas shrugged, "Home, I guess. I have an awesome idea!"

Aragorn thought that Legolas was really starting to use that word to much.

-

Aragorn and Legolas snickered as they tip-toed down the wine cellar. They walked up to where Thranduil's wine was, and switched it out with a glass of Kool-aid. Then, they went around switching out the rest of the wine with Kool-aid.

"Now we will break his wine drinking habit," Legolas said.

Aragorn laughed evilly, and rubbed his hands together.

"Don't ever do that again," Legolas said.

"Okay."

"Have you tasted the wine lately!?" Thranduil exclaimed to his son. "They must have changed something!"

Legolas froze, fear coming to him. Had his Father found out? Had Aragorn ratted him out? No, Aragorn would never do that.

"IT'S WONDERFUL!"

Legolas let out a sigh. "Yes, Ada. I tried it."

"Great! I love this stuff! I'm on my two hundred and thirty-second glass, and still not drunk!"

"Um, yeah, great. Ada, I have to go now, I uh..."

"I must have my revenge!" Aragorn screamed, running in the throne room.

"Is that your human friend?" Thranduil asked.

"Yes. I think I need to take him to Imladris. I thought he had healed, but it seems as if something from the wound has affected him."

"I thought he was always like that."

"Oh, yeah. You're right. He wants me to go kill some orcs with him though."

"Sure, go on, just be sure to be back in time for my party."

 **Review or you will be next in Aragorn's revenge slaying! (Or Legolas might just shoot you)**


	2. Orcs are killed, and Kool-aid is drank

**Thank you Sixty-four K,** **NirCele, DORK DOG, wenduo, Monster nr. 742, and guest for reviewing!**

"YYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! Aragorn charged into the group of orcs, his sword raised over his head. Legolas fired arrow, after arrow at the orcs. Every arrow hitting its mark, because they tend to do that when someone shoots them, especially Legolas. Aragorn had a bow too, but rarely used it. He just likes to charge in without thinking. Um, well, Legolas likes to do that too, but with style, and shooting his bow.

Blood and orc head flew everywhere. Finally, Aragorn came to a stop, looking around him. Most of the orc had arrows through them, one or two had sword marks.

"HEY! I told you not to kill them all!"

"I saved a few for you," Legolas said. "And I gave you a head start." He hadn't really, Aragorn had just charged in, and Legolas had been drinking Kool-aid and watching him while being quite humored. He would have got popcorn, but had gotten bored, and just wanted to slay some vile orcs. Actually most of them weren't that dirty, they had just had a bubble bath.

Legolas glared at Aragorn, "You should be ashamed," he told him. "These orcs are cleaner than you!"

Aragorn shrugged, "Oh, well."

Suddenly they heard shouting; they turned to see the twins Elladan and Elrohir running toward them screaming. They came to a stop in front of the two, who both had confused looks on their faces.

"How dare you!" Elladan yelled.

"What did we do?" Aragorn asked.

"You very well know what you did, little brother."

"Little bother?" Legolas asked. "Oh, sorry, I forgot. You're adopted. Duh."

Aragorn glared at him. Legolas ignored it.

"So what did we do again?"

"You killed our orcs!" Elrohir exclaimed.

"Oh, sorry. It's Legolas' fault, he killed most of them. He never saves any for me, it's not fair."

"That's not excuse! You –"

"Here, have some Kool-aid," Legolas said, thrusting a cup at the twins.

Elladan took it and tasted it, "HOLY SOMETHING OR ANOTHER! THIS IS AWESOME!" (The twins have been hanging around humans too much too). He handed it to Elrohir, who tried it.

"This is the best thing ever!" Elrohir exclaimed. "You are forgiven, we will avenge our mother another day. Do you have anymore?"

"Oh, yes, plenty." Legolas handed them two more cups, then gave one to Aragorn when he got that look on his face when he wanted to strange Legolas, or his adopted brothers.

"We must take this to ADA!" Elrohir exclaimed.

"He wouldn't drink it," Elladan said.

"Then we can trick him!"

Elladan shrugged, "Okay."

-.-

Elladan, Elrohir, Aragorn and Legolas snickered as they snuck down the hall to the kitchen. Elladan peeked around the edge into the kitchen.

"All clear!" he whispered in a whisper yell. Which meant anyone within five miles could hear them. Five miles away, a random elf looked up as he heard a voice. It sounded like one of the twins. He ran away as fast as he could.

The four tiptoed into the huge room, and set the jugs of Kool-aid they were carrying onto the counter.

"Not there!" Legolas exclaimed to Aragorn as he started to put it on the floor.

"Be nice," Elladan said, "He is our brother."

Aragorn turned to put it on the counter, and tripped over a piece of pie the cook had left out (no, he was not walking on the counter. The cook was just well... suffice to say, the cook had just been fired. They may have been a orc spy, not sure, Elrond still had that up for debate).

Kool-aid flew everywhere, and Aragorn let out an un-earthly screech.

"He's adopted," Elrohir said.

-.-

"How kind of you to join us for the evening meal," Elrond greeted Legolas. He shot a glare at a dirty, stained Aragorn; why could his adopted son never stay clean? Legolas grinned and sat down next to the filthy Aragorn, who was in a grumpy mood.

"I like him, he's always so nice to me," Legolas told Aragorn. "Whenever I come to eat, my Ada always gripes at how late I am, then forces me to drink wine."

Aragorn looked over at Legolas, "I think your Ada is very nice," he said.

"Then you must not know him very well," Legolas said.

"Ha! You must not know my Ada very well then!"

"Maybe we should switch Adas some time," Legolas suggested.

"That's a great idea!" Aragorn exclaimed.

"Yes! Let's do it then!"

Suddenly, in the middle of the two making plans, red liquid sprayed all over the long table.

"What is this vile drink?!" Elrond exclaimed. Elladan and Elrohir jumped up and ran. Erestor calmly brushed the Kool-aid spit off his arm, and took a sip of his drink. (He didn't know what Elrond found wrong with the drink, he liked it quite well).

"Is this some orc potion! I will find this intruder and... I bet it was that cook! When I find them I will..."

Legolas leaned over and whispered in Aragorn's ear. "He's still better than my Ada."

But Aragorn wasn't listening; he was slowly slinking down into his seat, until only the top of his dirty hair was showing. Then he disappeared all together.

-.-

"Let's go visit Gondor," Legolas suggested.

"I don't wanna," Aragorn grumbled.

"Come on, it'll be fun. And you can go in undercover."

Aragorn's eyes lit up. "Yesss! We can be spiesss," he said, cackled evilly, and rubbed his hands together.

"Stop," Legolas said.

Aragorn stood up straight. "Okay. Wait, won't you miss your Ada's party?"

"Meh. We'll go later."

Aragorn shrugged. "Okay."

-.-

Aragorn cackled evilly again as they rode into Gondor. Legolas was hunched over, hood pulled tightly over his head and trying not to be recognized with this maniac.

"We must see the steward of Gondor!" Aragorn exclaimed to a guard. "We have a very important message for him!"

"Right this way," the guard said. "Are you planning to poison him?"

"No!" Aragorn exclaimed.

The guard looked disappointed.

Suddenly there was a shriek behind them, Legolas turned to see a sixteen year-old blond girl running toward him. She wore a shirt with a head shot of a blond elf, and writing across it that said I LOVE LEGOLAS! Legolas blinked.

"Those are strange clothes," he said.

"Legolas, my love!" the girl shrieked.

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!" Legolas shrieked. "A Mary-Sue!"

He jerked out an arrow, and shot this Mary-Sue RIGHT IN THE EYE SOCKET! OH YEAH! LET'S DANCE, OH YEAH, LET'S DANCE, OH YEAH! Um... never mind. Carry on. Back to the matter at hand.

Legolas left the girl withering and dying, and followed the guard up some stairs. And some more stairs, and some more, and ugh... let's just skip to a few hours later.

Aragorn stood at the edge of the thingy, overlooking the vast plain below. "WOW! I can see Mirkwood from here!"

"See what!?" Legolas exclaimed.

"Mirkwood, can you not...? Oh, never mind."

They turned as the steward of Gondor stomped out to meet them. "What do you want?" he snapped.

Legolas thrust a cup of Kool-aid at him, "Here, this is for you."

He grabbed it, and took a drink. "THIS IS AWESOME!" he screamed, then gulped down the rest. "More! More!"

Legolas tossed him another cup, before he strangled them. "AAAAAAHHHHHHH! More! MORE!" He screamed, then started running around in circles. "SUGAR SUGAR SUGAR SUGAR SUGAR SUGAR!"

"Uh... Okay," Legolas said slowly.

Aragorn had his hands over his eyes, "No! Traumatic life event. Must forget! Must not remember! AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! HELP! NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOO!" Aragorn stopped screaming, and then started hyperventilating.

"Legolas," he gasped out. "I must forget this day!"

Legolas shrugged, then hit him on the back of the head.

Aragorn wandered around for two days wondering who he was.

 **Free Kool-aid for all of you who review!**


	3. Legolas takes Kool-aid to the Valor

**Thank you everyone who reviewed! This is the most** **reviews I've ever had on any of my stories! I'm so excited! Thank you all so much!**

"I KNOW WHO I AM NOW!" Aragorn screamed.

Legolas jumped ten feet in the air in surprise, and hit his head on a seven-inch round tree branch. He was unconscious for two hours. Aragorn found Legolas' blanky and set it over him, but it only covered his face.

"AAAAAAHHHHH!" Legolas shrieked, in a fabulous manner. He grabbed the blanky and shoved it into his pocket. "MINE!" he snapped.

Aragorn shrugged and walked to his horse.

Legolas rubbed the back of his head and ran after Aragorn.

"Where to next?" Aragorn asked.

"Where would you like to go?" Legolas really didn't want to go home yet.

"Let's go visit Saruman," Aragorn said.

"NO! Not that old grump! It's not like he'll turn evil and try to take the One ring, which I most _certainly_ know nothing about!, becoming corrupt and evil, trying to kill –"

"Okay, I get it," Aragorn said. He looked sad, so Legolas handed him some Kool-aid. Aragorn took a drink, and cheered up. "OH! How about we go see Valar!"

"Great idea!" Legolas exclaimed. "I'll get my jet."

Aragorn looked sad again. "My Ada never gets me anything like that."

Legolas handed him some strawberry-kiwi Kool-aid, Aragorn looked happier.

Suddenly a red-haired, unnamed elf came running up, sobbing. She dropped down in front of Legolas, tears streaming down her face. "I'm sorry!" she sobbed. "I was blind, I regret my actions! Please, forgive me! I see now the dwarf was not for me, you are! My own true love."

Legolas side stepped and whispered into Aragorn's ear, "Who is this? And what is she talking about?"

Aragorn shrugged. "No idea." He took a drink of Kool-aid.

"Meh." Legolas walked off, tossing a bottle of Kool-aid to this unnamed elf. This unnamed elf gulped down the Kool-aid.

"KKKKKKKKKIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLIIIIIIIIIII!" she shrieked. "I'm coming back! I'm sorry! You are my true love."

"Are you sure she's an elf?" Legolas asked.

"Yep," Aragorn replied, sucking up his Kool-aid with a straw.

"Oh well. You know how Ada is about kinslaying."

Aragorn nodded, now drinking a grape Kool-aid.

-.-

"Hey do! Merry do! Ring a dong dillo! Ring a dong! Hop along! Fal la the willow! Tom Bom, jolly Tom, Tom Bombadillo!"

"What on middle earth is that?!" Aragorn exclaimed.

Legolas's eyes widened. "RUN!"

"Hello, fellows!" A cheerful voice rang out.

"Too late," Legolas grumbled.

"Hi!" Aragorn greeted, as a man with a full brown beard appeared. "I'm Aragorn!"

"I am Tom Bombadil!" The weirdo greeted, (that's what _Legolas_ thought of him, not saying anything about me).

"What have I told you about talking to strangers?!" Legolas hissed at Aragorn.

"Sorry," Aragorn said. "Kool-aid?"

"Hi, blond-haired elf, whom I have forgotten the name of!" Tom exclaimed.

"Hi," Legolas muttered.

"Speak up, lad, I can't hear you!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"No need for screaming," Tom said cheerfully.

Legolas threw some Kool-aid at Tom. Tom caught it, and took a drink. "Mmm, very good! Goldberry! Come have a try at this!"

Legolas threw a fifty pound bottle of Kool-aid at Tom, which knocked him out. Then he ran away, Aragorn following him.

-.-

"Do you know how to fly this?" Aragorn asked, as the two boarded the jet.

"Of course," Legolas replied. "PILOT!" He yelled, "Get us in the air."

"Aye, aye, sir," came a reply.

"What are you? A dwarf?"

"That's right sir. My name's, Gimli sir."

"Oh, right." Legolas grabbed a glass of wine and plopped down on a chair. "Pilot, send us into hyper speed."

"Aye, aye, sire." There was a _ggrrrr_. Then, "Shut up, will you? Chewbacca!"

The plane jerked, and Kool-aid flew everywhere, staining Legolas' nice white shirt, and twice as much got all over Aragorn. But no one ever noticed, even him.

"We are here!" Gimli exclaimed.

"Finally!" Legolas exclaimed, "I'm going to have to find a new pilot, this one is always late!"

"It only took two minutes and twenty-seven seconds," Aragorn said.

"Exactly!"

Suddenly someone popped up in front of him. "Hi! My name is Han Solo, can I be your pilot?"

"No!" Legolas exclaimed. "You stink!"

"But, but, what about him?" Han said, motioning to Aragorn.

"He just needs a bath; you smell likea dead animal."

"Well, it's not my fault I had to stick Luke Whinewalker in a foul beast. I mean, seriously, is whining passed down from Father to Son?"

"Be gone!" Legolas exclaimed.

Han started crying, then shuffled off. Legolas shook his head. "I hate it when they go around crying like that, I mean, come on! Really? What – uh, Aragorn, why are you crying?"

Aragorn sniffed. "I'm a sympathetic crier."

"In the name of the VALAR! STOP CRYING!"

"HOW DARE YOU US THE NAME OF THE VALAR IN SUCH A MANNER!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

-.-

"Is he gone?" Aragorn asked. Legolas and Aragorn were huddled under a bush, peeking out through the branches.

"I think so," Legolas whispered.

"Who was that?"

"Tulkas," Legolas replied. He pulled out two bottles of Kool-aid from his backpack, and gulped them down.

"What about me?" Aragorn asked.

"Oh, you wanted one? Here." Legolas tossed him another bottle of Kool-aid.

"This looks like blood," Aragorn said.

"Well, some Kool-aid does."

Aragorn shrugged and opened the bottle.

"WAIT! Don't drink that! That is orc blood!"

"I though orc blood was black?"

"This one was uh... weird." Legolas grabbed the bottle, "I'm suppose to give this to Sherlock."

"Oh. I'm always left out." Aragorn said, and he started crying.

Legolas handed him some real Kool-aid.

He was then happy.

-.-

"Where's the doorbell?" Legolas asked.

"I don't think they have one," Aragorn replied. "You have to knock."

"I don't know how to knock."

Before them were two large double doors, on the door was a sign that said. 'Welcome to the halls of Mandos!'

Aragon rolled his eyes and pounded his fist on the door. Legolas grinned. So _that_ was knocking, he would have to remember that!

One of the doors swung open, and a tall figure towered over them. "What do you want?" he growled. Well, he didn't really growl, they just thought he did, since he had a really deep voice. I mean, really, really deep.

"We have come to visit the Valar," Legolas said. "We come in peace, and we also bring Kool-aid!"

"Are you dead?"

"No."

"Come back when you're dead," Mandos said.

"But we used hyper speed to get here," Legolas said.

"What?"

"Never mind. Do I _have_ to be dead?"

"Yes."

"Aragorn, quick, kill me!"

"But you'll miss your Ada's party."

Legolas held out a knife. "Make it quick and painless."

"But then I won't have an orc slaying buddy."

"You're right," Legolas said. "I don't want to give up orc slaying. I'll find another way to avoid my Ada's party."

"Good! Let's go then!" Aragorn exclaimed.

"Bye!" Mandos called after them.

"Bye!"

Aragorn tossed him back some Kool-aid. Mandos caught it and took a drink. His eyes widened and he rapidly gulped down the rest. From that point on, it was his favorite drink.

-.-

Yavanna took a sip of Kool-aid. "Not bad," she said.

"I know right!?" Mandos exclaimed.

Ulmo walked up and held out his glass. "Can I have more?"

-.-

"So, where to next?" Legolas mused.

"We could kill some orcs," Aragorn said. "Do you think Lord Celeborn and Lady Galadriel would like Kool-aid?"

 **Free visit to the Valor and Kool-aid for reviewers!**


	4. Legolas finally goes to his Ada's party

**Thank you everybody for the wonderful reviews! And finally the wait is over, here is chapter 4!**

"ACH! I hate these mosquitoes!" Aragorn exclaimed, slapping around himself. He hit himself in the face. Legolas snickered. "Oh-ho, you think that is funny!" Aragorn exclaimed.

"Maybe," Legolas said with a smirk, then, "Get off! Get off!"

Aragorn burst out laughing. Then slapped at a mosquito.

"Aragorn! Your nose!" Legolas pointed to Aragorn's nose.

"What is it?"

"There's a huge mosquito on your nose!"

"AH! Get off me, you vile tiny beast!"

"Hold still! I'll get it!" Legolas told him. He jerked out one of his knives from off his back, and swung at the huge mosquito.

Aragorn slapped at his nose. "Ow! Ow! Ow!" He jumped off his horse and started hopping around. Legolas slew the mosquito with his fabulous knife.

"No wonder the spiders in Mirkwood are so big," Aragorn mused, blood was streaming out of his nose. He took a drink of Kool-aid.

"We're not anywhere near – will you stop calling it that?!"

Aragorn shrugged and drank the rest of his Strawberry Kool-aid.

"In the name of the Valar!" Legolas exclaimed. Aragorn let out a screech, and dove under a bush. Legolas rolled his eyes.

"You can come out now," Legolas said. Aragorn slowly crawled out from under the bush, looking around.

"You have a bunch of blood coming out of your nose," Legolas said.

"Oh."

"Here," Legolas pulled some paper towels and duct tape out of his pocket. "This will fix it." They patched up Aragorn's nose, and continued on. They both drank more Kool-aid.

"Are we there yet?" Aragorn asked.

"No. Where are we going again?"

"Your Ada's party."

"Oh. I don't want to go," Legolas said.

"Well, I want to."

"Fine," Legolas grumbled. He grabbed his bottle and gulped down some Kool-aid.

"We're here!" Aragorn cheered.

"And how would you know?"

"The huge spiders that are about to eat us."

"Oh, yeah, that's one way," Legolas said, shooting a spider in the eye that appeared before him. Three more spiders came rushing out, Aragorn jumped off his horse, his sword drawn.

"YYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!"

Legolas killed two spiders as Aragorn's first stroke fell. More spiders came running out, Legolas jumped off his horse, and jerked out his twin knives. In seconds the fight was into full swing. Spider legs flew everywhere, arrows were stuck into eye sockets. Blood squirted from wounds, and eye sockets. Is this getting too gruesome for you? Okay, okay. I'll stop the wonderful tale, or at least tone it down at bit.

Aragorn sliced his sword down a spider's face, and another came up behind him. He swung around, as the spider tried to bite his leg. Aragorn swung an awesome round kick, and hit the spider. It let out a - those strange noises they make. Then he drove his sword through the spider's heart.

"Yay," Legolas said, he clapped some. "I need better competition," he grumbled.

"Hey! Would you rather have that red haired dwarf as a slaying buddy?!" Aragorn exclaimed, stomping up to his sword. He tripped over a stick. Then fell. And broke his leg.

"Just great! This is just great! Could my day get any better?!"

"Kool-aid?" Legolas asked.

"You're back!"

Legolas's eyes widened as Thranduil rushed up and gave him a hug.

"Ada!" he whined.

"My son has returned!" Thranduil exclaimed. "Party time! Everyone go get ready!" He looked over at Aragorn. "What happened!"

"Oh, we got attacked by massive mosquito, and Mirkwood spiders," Aragorn replied.

"Yeah. But that's not how he got hurt," Legolas said. Aragorn shot him a look, and he shut up.

"You look horrible! Why do you have duct tape on your nose?"

Aragorn pointed at Legolas. "He did it!"

"Well, let's get you fixed up," Thranduil said. "Then…PARTY TIME!"

"You Ada is so nice," Aragorn said to Legolas. "Whenever I go to my Ada hurt, he just gets mad at me, and makes me lie in bed for two weeks."

"I wish my Ada would let me lie around more when I get wounded," Legolas said. "He just gets me patched up, then it's party time."

"Come on!" Thranduil called back. "It's party time. And I invited Batman!"

"BATMAN!" Aragorn shrieked, and ran after him. He tripped over the crutches one of the elves had given him, and sprained his thumb.

"Do you know how hard it is to eat with a wounded thumb?" Aragorn asked.

"No, would you tell me?"

Aragorn glared at Legolas and tossed his fork behind him.

"OOWWW!"

Aragorn and Legolas turned to see Batman behind them, he had a fork sticking out of his chest.

"BATMAN!" Aragorn shrieked, he jumped up and gave Batman a hug.

"AAAAAAHHHHHHH!"

"What's wrong?" Aragorn asked.

"He has a fork halfway into his chest," Legolas said, taking a sip of Kool-aid.

"Oh, sorry." Aragorn gave him a cheesy grin.

Thranduil ran up and gave Batman a cup of Kool-aid, "This will make you better."

Batman took it and a gulped it down. "AWESOME!"

A grin spread across Thranduil's face, "Ah, you like my wine!"

"It's not wine," Batman said. Legolas and Aragorn froze, but Thranduil hadn't heard them. He was jumping around, and dancing as the disco ball came on. He grabbed the edge of his cape and spun around.

"I've never felt so marvelous!" Thranduil cheered, he took another drink of Kool-aid.

"What's wrong with him?" Batman asked.

"Sugar rush," Galion said, appearing beside them. He had a bored look on his face, and held a jug of Kool-aid.

"AAHHH!" Batman jumped three feet in the air. He turned to face Galion.

"Yesss?" Galion asked slowly.

"You-you," Batman sputtered. Then he rushed forward and gave Galion a hug. "YAHHH!"

"Um... This is weird."

"FINALLY! Would you like to become my apprentice!"

"Of what exactly?"

"Riding the world of evil! And... uh.. other fun Batman stuff."

Galion shrugged, "Sure." He tossed the Kool-aid jug behind him, and followed Batman to the Batmobile.

Thranduil came running up, and tripped on the Kool-aid. He fell, and slid halfway across the dining hall. As he came to a stop, he jumped up and looked around to make sure no one saw him. He fabulously tossed his hair, and walked up to Legolas.

"Where is Galion?"

"Oh, he went to be Batman's apprentice."

"Bummer. Well, now I need a new wine server."

Legolas shrugged. "Beats me."

"AH! I got it!" Thranduil exclaimed.

"What?"

"You could be the wine server!" Thranduil said. "Just for a while anyway!"

Legolas and Aragorn ran, well, Aragorn hobbled away (He knew he would end up helping too). Legolas slipped on the Kool-aid, and jumped up, then crashed into a wall. He tried to toss his hair fabulously, but got it caught in a nearby statue. He jerked it lose, pulling half of it out in the meantime, and continued running.

Finally the two stopped in a long empty hallway.

"Why are we running again?" Aragorn asked.

-.-

"I don't think that's so bad."

Legolas glared at his human friend, "Serving wine. Seriously? There would be no slaying orcs, or spiders, or Balrogs."

"We haven't killed any Balrogs," Aragorn said blankly.

"Don't ruin my hopes and dreams!" Legolas snapped.

"Sorry," Aragorn said, he took a drink of grape Kool-aid. "So when do we get to switch?"

"When do you want too?"

"After the next Orc hunt," Aragorn replied.

"Okay."

"Let's go slay some orcs!" Aragorn cried, he pumped his fist in the air, and tripped over his crutch. "Uh... Ahem. No one saw that."

"We need a plan," Legolas said.

"Plan, that's simple. Load up on arrows, sharpen our swords, and slay some orcs."

"Not that," Legolas said. "The other one."

Aragorn shrugged, "Okay, let's get some Kool-aid first."

"Good plan."

A few minutes later, the two sat in the wine cellar sipping Kool-aid. Footsteps echoed in the stairway, Kool-aid flew everywhere.

"Ah-ha!"

"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Legolas and Aragorn dove under the table. A face appeared in front of them.

"Oh, good. You came down here, I was looking for you everywhere! Now come out."

Legolas and Aragorn crawled out from under the table, and Thranduil thrust a jug of Kool-aid into Legolas's hands. "Here you are." He smirked at his son, and turned tossing his fabulous hair, then - "I know Kool-aid when I taste it."

Legolas looked down at the jug in his hands, then at Aragorn. Aragorn shrugged, and took a drink of berry Kool-aid.

Thranduil stuck his head around the wall. "Oh, Aragorn. Come join me at the table, you shouldn't be walking around on a broken leg."

 **All reviewers will be invited to Thranduil's next party! With Kool-Aid of course.**


	5. Legolas visits Lothlórien with Kool-aid

**Okay everybody, here is the last chapter of the story. Thank you Sixty-four K, NirCele, DORK DOG, wenduo, Monster nr. 742, LadyofAnfalas, 7doom, Queen Amaryllis Kay, Pip the Dark Lord, and guest for all your reviews! 29 reviews so far! Enjoy!**

"How is your leg?" Legolas asked his human friend.

"Good, thank you for asking."

Legolas kicked him in the knee.

"OW! What was that for?!"

"I had to serve Kool-aid all night! While you sat and dined at the KING'S TABLE!"

"You didn't ask for help," Aragorn said. "And you shouldn't try tricking your Ada."

Legolas started sulking; Aragorn handed him some Kool-aid and he cheered up. "Where are we going?" Aragorn asked.

"Lothlorien, since we forgot to stop by there."

"Okay," Aragorn said, and took a drink of Kool-aid.

-.-

"Legolas, Aragorn," Haldir greeted the two. "How are you?"

"Wonderful," Aragorn said, with a huge grin.

"Okay," Legolas said. "How are you doing?"

"Terrible!" Haldir exclaimed. "I've been guarding this border for days now! And no orcs have attacked! It terrible, I'm having no fun at all!"

"Here," Legolas gave him some Kool-aid. Haldir took a drink.

"I LOVE THIS!" he exclaimed.

"Good. Because I don't," Legolas said.

"I thought you loved it!" Aragon exclaimed.

"Well, I don't anymore," Legolas grumbled.

Aragorn gave him some Cherry Lime Kool-aid.

"This is AWESOME!" Legolas shrieked.

-.-

"Greetings," Celeborn greeted as he greeted Legolas and Aragorn.

Legolas greeted him in the formal elven way.

"Howdy," Aragorn said. "Wow! This place is awesome!"

"Uh... Thank you?" Celeborn said. Galadriel came up beside her husband, and greeted the famed, one of them not very effective, orc slayers.

"Come, come," Galadriel said, leading them. "You must be hungry."

"Yes! Very!" Aragorn exclaimed.

Legolas kicked him in the leg, the broken one.

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!"

Celeborn and Galadriel rushed to his side. "Are you all right?"

"Mosquito!" Aragorn shrieked.

"Oh my goodness!" Galadriel exclaimed. "There's a bone sticking out of your leg!"

"There is? Cool!"

-.-

A few hours later, several elves, and Aragorn sat around a table feasting. Legolas sat by Aragorn, stealing most of his food. Aragorn was too busy telling the other elves of how cool it looked when the bone stuck out of his leg.

"What is this wonderful stuff?" Galadriel asked.

"Kool-aid," Legolas replied. He slipped his hand over on Aragorn's plate to grab that very good looking piece of meat, Aragorn slapped his hand.

"Ow! What was that for?!"

"You tried to steal my food!"

"Did not!"

"Oh, really? Then what have you been doing for the last twenty minutes?"

"Eating."

"Yes! My food!"

"Have not."

"Have to!"

"NOT!"

"HAVE!"

"NOT!"

"HAVE!"

Suddenly the two stopped. "What where we arguing about?" Legolas asked.

Aragorn shrugged. "Dunno, I forgot."

They started eating again, Aragorn wondering where most his food had gone.

Someone in a white dress shot past them. Celeborn ran after this white flash. A few minutes later he came back dragging a grinning Galadriel.

"What did you put in the drink?!"

"Sugar," Legolas replied. "It makes one happy."

"Which one?"

"Uh... I guess who ever is sad or angry, or whatever."

"I hate sugar. Look what it did to my wife!"

Legolas and Aragorn looked around Celeborn. "She seems fine to me," Legolas said. He stole Aragorn's dessert.

Galadriel was twirling around, her not-so-white dress swirling around her. "What a wonderful world!" she exclaimed. "All is well, not a single problem! I must go out and visit the peoples of middle earth!"

"See!" Celeborn exclaimed. "Her daughter was kidnapped by orcs, and had to sail to the undying lands! Also, she hates traveling!"

"How would you know?"

"Well, she just hates helicopters, and that's what I always ride in."

Suddenly Galadriel rushed up, and gave Legolas and Aragorn a hug. "I am so glad you came!"

"I'm not," Celeborn grumbled.

"Aragorn!" Galadriel exclaimed, "I give you my blessing to marry my granddaughter!"

"What!" Celeborn shrieked.

"You have a granddaughter? Is she pretty? Even better, does she like Kool-aid?"

-.-

A long ways off, Elladan and Elrohir set a glass down next to Arwen. Well, Elladan did, they both couldn't do it. They could but it would be... never mind. Back to the story. Arwen picked up the glass and took a drink.

"Mmm, this is good!"

"I know, right?!"

A couple hours later, Elrond was running down the halls yelling. "ELLADAN! ELROHIR!"

The twins appeared. "Yes, Ada?"

"Why did you give Arwen Kool-aid?! You know I hate that stuff, and it's full of sugar!"

"What about it?"

"She's hyper!"

"Oh, okay. Is that bad?"

"Have you ever seen her hyper?"

"No. Why?"

A shrill voice filled the hall, "ELLADAN! ELROHIR! Do you have any more of that wonderful stuff!?"

-.-

Legolas glared at the forest around him, he was mad. Aragorn sat on his horse beside him.

"I hate Kool-aid!" Legolas said.

Aragorn handed him some Kool-aid. Legolas drank it. Then was happy.

The End :) (Don't worry, there are more Legolas and Aragorn adventures to come!)

 **Free Kool-Aid for all reviews! This was such a fun story to write, and I bid you all a very fond farewell on Legolas discovers Kool-aid, thank you for reading!**


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